Whirlwinds

Its been a little quiet on the Woman X Collective front since our last piece on my beautiful friend was posted but as always a break is sometimes needed.

Especially when your energy requires to make certain shifts.

Over the last couple of weeks, I have had to deal with some psychological and energetic changes in regards to how I feel about myself and how I choose to hold myself as a person.

In short I was reviewing my worthiness.

I do this a lot anyway but I feel it was much more of a push this time round because the wound comes from childhood.

Of course, it was something I thought I didn’t need, but who am I kidding? The universe is always constantly asking us to re evaluate every tiny detail of ourselves.

We have had some major planetary shifts in the cosmos that have forced our energies to shed what we no longer need and to release what is no longer serving our greater good.

For me, I’ve finally got my ahh-ha moment today.

I could feel the work happening in the background as I celebrated a milestone birthday and was fortunate enough to have time away in a beautiful part of the world to contemplate some of these feelings while the shifts were taking place, it felt like it was complete divine timing.

But since coming back, I’ve had to brunt the feelings in everyday life like everybody else instead of sipping mocktails, wearing less clothing and staring at magical sunsets.

Let’s get down to it shall we, the feelings I’ve described regarding my worthiness is how I accept to be treated by others.

I’m sure others will be able to resonate here and possibly do a little self reflection wherever the wound may be sitting for them.

Now, when it comes to some relationships I’ve always been the one who forgives, forgets and moves forward in hopes that the other person will see what they do and have optimism that they will rectify their actions in future.

Depending on the person, I sometimes don’t say how I truly feel because I’m fearful I will loose the person completely and I’m fearful of the unnecessary drama that can be associated with the persons response.

Some people who know me, will say “thats a bit of bullshit Felicia you always say how you feel.”

But in some relationships I actually don’t and I try not to let it effect me, but it always cuts deep when I don’t speak up.

I’m very lucky that I have a husband that knows me well and knows my worthiness and will pull at these feelings and ask me to sit with them and sort them out by actually speaking my truth.

BUT I always say “No, don’t worry I’ll deal with it in my own way and I’ll manage.”

When I do this though, I place my feelings in a box and store it under my mental bed and I never actually deal with it.

So, going back to my ahh-ha moment I’ve come up with the below:

I do believe that no matter what your circumstance in life are, we as human beings have choices. Good ones and bad ones.

We have choices in the way we think, speak and behave.

I’ve learnt that this is how we grow and become aware of our surroundings.

Even if some people repeat this step time and time again.

What I’m trying to get at is that we try to make choices that are best for us.

It feels rewarding if the choices we make are with intentions that are for the goodness of the soul and help you strive forward to become a better person on the inside because it will reflect on the outside and people will feel that positive choice and reciprocate.

But sometimes the choices some of us make are self righteous, destructive and hurt those around us. Even though we may think it isn’t effecting those around us it, it always does.

I’ve learnt that good choices are more then words, it’s genuine sincere actions.

We as human beings choose to be kind people, we choose how we treat people, we choose to be good to ourselves and we certainly choose how we see our futures.

I wouldn’t be human if I said it wasn’t hard, because it is.

People betray us, people hurt us and people can simply be selfish and that’s what can make choices towards how we treat people so hard.

But we need to know our worth and start serving the purpose.

I want a peaceful, loving, healthy and fulfilling life and so I will make choices that will give me those outcomes.

I will do this by making the choice to not take on what a person may be projecting out that is negative, by walking away from someone when necessary, by taking a break from the person when I need to reflect on what’s going on and ultimately my intent will be to end up speaking my truth.

Just know that speaking your truth to the person may give them the nudge they may need to help you both move forward in a good way, but also accept the fact that it may also mean that they walk away and learn that choice is ok too.

Own your worth and don’t ever give up on yourself!

Whatever will be, will be 💓

With love,

Fe